replacement...

I may not be replaced and you certainely aren't.
I wonder why you think that, maybe the same reason I do.
Being so far apart, it feels like even pigeons get more of your life than I do.
I'm jealous of the wind blowing softly on your face instead of me.
But you know something, I'm not going to write some heart-broken tear stained words.
I'm just going to get up, get in the car blast the music and go for a drive.
Over and out...

Not me...

This isn't me feeling the way I feel...
Jealousy has never been a part of my life.
Now it's curling up in my heart, slowly eating at it.
How is it that they get to have each other??

But you know what I'm not jealous.
I'm happy.
I hope you stay in love forever.
Keep each other safe.
Please keep him safe and keep him happy.
Never let the smile be wiped of his face.
Sing to him and hold him tight.
Fight for him with all your might.
I failed, please don't do the same.
I won't say I didn't deserve him, because I did.
But things happen.
You're a woman and you know him well.
Read between the lines and tell him that I won't break my promises.
That he WILL always be in my heart forever.
That names of daughters are in place and plans for greatness are on the way.
You wrote something that had so many single words in it.
Each and every one of them was part of us, and giggled over.

Ok that was me...

killer whales

I thought about this big dramatic post yesterday before bed, happy I had something to say...then something happened...I fell asleep
Go figure
While I was sleeping, I had a terrible experience, a lucid dream...
I was on vacation with my family and we're swimming in this beautiful blue water...
Me mom and dad dive underwater, and there's this black thing, I reach for it and it just shoots away from us, it was a killer whale...
I was so scared, I just sank to the bottom an laid there, thinking my dad will save me...
I just laid there with my arms out and waiting, no one came for me...I wanted to die...
All I could think is "If no comes for me, I'll lay here and die"
I woke up with the worst asthma attack I've had in months...
I really couldn't breethe,m it was awful...
I thought I was going to suffocate...nothing new really...